The Big Sick: What's a Love Story Without the Lies?

The Big Sick is a 2017 romance movie based around the true story of Kumail Nanjiani and his wife, Emily V. Gordon. Starting from the couple's first meeting, the barriers that the two encounter are comprised mainly of Emily's sickness, the titular "Big Sick," and Kumail's regular meetings with potential brides, his parents' orders. The entire first act of the movie is based around the build up of Kumail's and Emily's relationship, featuring a montage of of the two gradually falling in love. This classic love scene is marred by shots of Kumail's meetings with prospective brides.
All of this changes once Emily discovers the photos that Kumail has been keeping of the prospective brides. The discovery of Kumail's manipulation of Emily shocks her to the point that she storms away, vowing never to see him again. This is followed by the discovery of Emily's illness, leading into a portion of the romance genre rarely explored: the concept of consequences. Kumail has to own up to his choice of manipulation, not just to Emily, but her parents.

The concept of owning up to one's mistakes is something rarely explored in the romance genre, particularly with the realism expressed within The Big Sick. Kumail's confrontation of his mistakes and the subsequent reactions of his family and Emily. The manipulation within The Big Sick is a classic example of intra-manipulation, with the manipulation being done by one of the characters within the main coupling. This internal manipulation that is present within the movie ends up being the driving force behind the entirety of Kumail and Emily's relationship.

This is not to say that manipulation forms the foundation of their relationship. Rather, it is manipulation and the revelation of Kumail's manipulative acts that strengthen the couple's relationship as a whole. Due to this, the intra-manipulation present would best compared to a broken plate that, once fixed, became even stronger. After the revelation of Kumail's lies, Emily rightly refuses to see him. However, Kumail acknowledges his wrongdoings and desperately attempts to repair his relationship with Emily. It is only after Kumail reconciles with his own family, coming clean about what he wants and his relationship with Emily, that Kumail and Emily are truly able to be together in a healthy way.
What Kumail did to Emily was wrong and if the movie portrayed their story any other way, then it could not be considered a romance. However, Kumail's recognition of his wrongdoing and active efforts to fix this are what show that while manipulation is not healthy for a relationship, it does not need to be the stopping point. If the love is true and the individuals earnest, the happily ever after will come to pass.